In a room filled with 200 people, a speaker once asked, “Who would like this $20 bill?” All the hands went up. He announced he would give the money to someone with their hand raised, but then he crushed it into a ball in the palm of his hand. “Now who wants it?” he asked. Hands still stayed up. Then he dropped it on the ground and stomped on it. He picked up the crumpled, dirty $20 bill. “Now, who still wants it?” All the hands stayed up.
“You have all demonstrated a very valuable lesson,” he said. “No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value. It was still worth $20. Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by bad decisions and unfair situations. We may feel worthless, but you will never lose your value.”
This is a great lesson for kids. But what if we also applied it to our own parenting? Your value as your child’s mother or father can never change. You will always have that role. Your child’s success or status does not change your standing in their lives. Can you imagine if we fully embraced that value – the daily recognition that to our children, we’re always important. They will always raise their hands for us. Even when they don’t listen or perform or behave as hoped. Even when they say rotten things and do destructive things and prefer everyone but you. You’re still just as important in their lives every single day. So on the days you feel defeated as a parent, brush off the dirt, uncrumple your confidence and remember you have not lost a cent of your value for your child.
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